Reply for 2 of the discussion


Focus on solving problems rather than winning battles. Negotiating is about solving problems, not bringing down the other side, and focusing on fighting is the wrong way to go. Negotiating too aggressive attitude will irritate the other side and make the negotiation become irrational into personal attacks

Stay calm and third side. Looking at a problem from the third perspective makes it easier to get rid of personal prejudices. For example, in the conflict of online shopping, the conflict between sellers and buyers often needs the coordination of the shopping platform.

Weigh each other’s interests. In the negotiation, the interests of the other party should be taken into account. A plan that damages the interests of the other party too much is unlikely to be accepted by the other party.

When I had a conflict with my friend about whether to climb a dangerous mountain, BATNA ended up staying away from the dangerous mountain and travelling to another place together.
In this conflict, I have weighed the interests of both sides and reached an agreement on the solution by explaining the danger that the other side may encounter


1. Active Listening: Listening for what isn’t quite being said introduces very useful information to act on because there’s something you can do about next time to rebuild trust and resilience in your relationship and maybe even give your angry customer a sense of great satisfaction.

2. Patience: In a crisis, patience not only helps to keep things from getting more difficult, it also gives you the upper hand when you can see things clearly.

3. Don’t Let Conflict Avoidance Get You Off Track: Instead of avoiding conflict and putting yourself on a sure track to a serious breakdown of negotiations, a strong negotiator has a box of impasse-breaking tools like the use of new information and changing the structures of negotiation.

My parents want me to join their business after I graduate, but I want to try something else. My BATNA for this situation would be I get to do the job I want to, but if I don’t show them a good future, they will let me join their business. I will let them know that I am lack of experience and I would have horrible performance in their business. Or I can show them taht I can do better in other job. In that case, at least I have a chance to try the thing I want to.

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